must. have. sleep...

oh my WORD. babyman was none too precious this morning...middle of the night...pick a time, any time between midnight last night and now. it is currently 5:42am, and i have already completed a cup of coffee and a banana, and finished another section of my training manual. i have been physically up since 4:48, but awake from late 3-something or other? warren woke at 2, saying "peepee daddy"...ben had just gotten home, so i popped up and took him. deed done, back to bed (for both of us). then at 3:30ish..."peepee mommy?'...and here is my grand mistake.

tired as i was, i neglected how much more tired my poor giving husband must be. yep. i punched him awake so he could go take warren to peepee. i have been trying so hard not to do that, but the sleep monster came over me and made me a cranky, demanding, selfish person. !! needless to say, there was no bed after this. he got in bed with us. got out of bed to go fetch my blanket (already had his). got back in bed with us. kicked me a bit. kicked me some more. sat up, said "eat lunch?". when firmly admonished, said "sleep warren's bed". got in there, wanted mommy's bed. wanted to go watch elmo in the office. i am screaming by this time...still laying (or is it lying?) in bed, mind you, but yelling at the top of my lungs for this demon possessed child to go to sleep. this is about 4:20. ben whisks him off and leaves me to sleep...but left the monitor on.

after 20 minutes of hearing warren driving his exhausted, coughing, hacking father crazy, i cursed profoundly (sorry...had to release it somehow) and got out of bed. demanded that ben get back in bed, and held warren tightly and shushed him. after 10 minutes or so of lap-rocking (you know, where you sit on the edge of the bed with child on your lap and rock back and forth?), he was calm enough to lay down. read him 5 books...yes, 5. by the 5th (goodnight moon, of course) his eyes were closed, thumb firmly in mouth, favorite blanket corner firmly in palm of hand. i said prayers, he nodded to each statement (never once opening his eyes) and he was out. 5:10am.

but i'm not. i had to get up at 5am so that i could study. my entire household is asleep, except for me and my coffee pot.

sometimes, i really hate being a grownup. waaaaaa!!!